One of my wisest uncles is either turning 70 or 17. I don’t know which one yet, but one thing I know is that by next year he and I are going to be the same age. Often, we meet, talk, and laugh together and as we got ready to celebrate this milestone year for him, it got me thinking about what keeps him so young and lively and what makes us all age in the first place.

I began to think that though the days pass by and time makes us older on the outside, our physical appearance may change with time, but that in no way should affect our inner being. What changed as we grew from when we were a child, to who we are now? I am only a teenager with a long way to go and when I look back at my childhood photographs, I always see a child who is smiling and never upset. I sometimes jokingly wonder and say that with time I am not happy anymore and my mom would respond that it is dependent on what is on your mind. I realized that the answer to the mysterious question of what makes us age and get old is not time but is possibly the amount of memory we all hold on to. The way we think, we smile or what we react to also has changed with time, not sure if it is always for the better or not. Does that mean we should not age if that only makes us less happy? Well, possibly not, as this is what I have seen from my uncle.

Often, we hear the phrase that people are carrying the weight of the world on their shoulders in its true sense; the phrase is possibly referring to the “weight” as being the deep memory patterns that include opinions of other people and the likes and dislikes we create ourselves. As we were planning to celebrate my uncle’s birthday, I reflected on some of our fond conversations, and he would often say at birthday parties “We are not getting older, just getting wiser”. Getting older means we hold on to loads and loads of memories, and these patterns get cemented in our behavior and daily actions taking away from the young child inside us. Whereas getting wiser meant learning from the experiences we gain but not holding on to the emotions attached to those events, especially those that were the learnings of life. I feel this has been my uncle’s secret to staying young.

My uncle was born on February 29th, which already makes him unique, but regardless of him being 70 on the outside, his heart is still 17. We have so many unforgettable memories from our trips to India, Dubai, and him always being there through the night prepping for my birthday celebrations, making them epic. He has always been there for me and supported me. I have learned so much from him and continue to learn in every conversation we have. Throughout these years, I have never seen him get angry or agitated, and he demonstrates what Rajen uncle says to breathe in love and breathe out forgiveness. He is a role model for me, and he demonstrates those qualities and does not carry much mental baggage. With that, I wanted to wish Indra mama a happy birthday and thank you for always being there for me.